Promise me you'll never be afraid.

"Brian, where are you going?"


"I have to go!"


"Can you explain to me what's going on?"


"Can you stop to control me just once, Michelle?"


"I'm not controlling you. I'm worried."


"Yeah, you're always worried..." - I left the kitchen where Michelle and I where we were having lunch and ran towards my bedroom to pack my stuff. I agreed with Violet to wait till she call me again to tell me something but I couldn't be here just waiting for some bad or good news. Jimmy needs me there. Violet needs me there. So, while I was packing my stuff, I called to the guys to tell them what had happened with Jimmy. After the first call that was to Matt, Michelle came into the bedroom and sat in the edge of the bed looking at me. I had to tell you something. After all, Jimmy was her friend too and she deserved to know the true.


"Jimmy is in the hospital. He had another heart attack..."


"Oh my God! How is he?"


"I have no idea. I'm going to London right now." - I said putting the last things in my bag. I felt Michelle approached me, taking a bad of the closet. I looked at her trying to understand what she was doing.


"I go with you."


"No, you don't, Michelle. You'll be here taking care of Pinkly and Mr. Bungle."


"Your dad can do this. I have to go with you."


"Michelle, I said you don't need to go, okay? Your sister will stay here so you'll stay with her. The boys come with me; you don't have to worry about this."


"But Jimmy is also my friend and I wanna go there to support Violet. She must be devastated!"


"She's not alone and when the guys and I come there, she'll have lots of support. Now, I have to go. Zacky is waiting for me." - I gave her a little kiss on her lips and went downstairs. I stroked Pinkly's head and walked to the door.



"You're trying to be alone with her, aren't you?" - Michelle said looking at me from the top of the stairs. I'd yell at her to stop saying shit but the truth is, in part, she was right. I didn't want to be alone with Violet. I just wanted to be there supporting her and giving strength to Jimmy to get well as quickly as possible. Michelle could come but she's been too stifling and I need my freedom. I need some time just for me and she's not respecting that. She feels threatened by Violet even me showing her that for me Violet is just Jimmy's girlfriend and nothing more than that. I learned to live with Michelle during all these years. I've met her for a long time ago and she knows that I was never 100% faithful but this time she is controlling my every move and I'm going crazy with this. And this time so hard that I still know nothing about the condition of Jimmy, I needed to go without the shadow of Michelle behind me. So I just looked at her so she could understand I was getting tired about those conversations.
Out there, were Zacky and Johnny waiting for me. We were going, then get Matt and then we headed for the airport. With luck, we managed to flight an hour later.


"Why isn't Europe glued to the USA?" - I said sitting in my place. By my side was Zacky and in the left sit were Matt and Johnny. They didn't answer me. Just looked at me and did a expression of hopelessness. But the worst was yet to come. We had a travel of 10 hours ahead but when the plane had taken off, three girls got up to go to the bathroom. Turning back, the girls stared at us. They looked at us, but we didn't make the case. We could do everything but seduction games... not at all! They began to whisper to each other until they went to the bathroom. We started talking about the situation of Jimmy. He long ago that had those attacks and certainly he stopped taking the medication. But the truth is that it provided that Violet arrived; Jimmy was very enthusiastic and very excited. When we were talking about how happy he was, I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. When I was about to look back, I noticed that they had also tap Matt. we looked both back and were the three girls who had gone to the bathroom.


"OH MY GOD!"


"I TOLD YOU! OH MY GOODNESS!"


"We are your fans! We love you guys! Can we take a picture with you guys?"


"Sure." - Matt said. We took the picture with the girls and they noticed we were not okay and Jimmy wasn't there with us. We didn't really wanna talk about it and our luck was the host who came with the drinks and food. The girls came back to their sit and we, finally, could rest a bit. We ate, we drank, we slept but it seemed time didn't pass. I felt pain all over my body and my head was about to explode. a few hours later, we had arrived to London.
As we had no luggage, only a backpack with some clothes, we ran to the car rental agency. We searched the car keys that had rented and we drove quickly to the hospital but no longer was sufficient everything which was happening, none of us knew how to drive on the other side and with the steering wheel on the right side. And, further, none of us had a great practice driving manuals cars. Zacky took responsibility and he was driving. I confess I was expecting worse.
Nearly an hour on the road, we had arrived to the hospital. We parked the car and got to run inside the hospital. The waiting room was full of old people, children and adults screaming. We looked everywhere and we didn't find Violet until a young guy, about our age, approached us.


"You guys... you're Avenged Sevenfold, Jimmy's friends."


"Yes, we are. And you are?" – Matt asked.


"I'm Phil, Violet's brother. Come with me." - We follow Violet's brother who took us to a small room near the infirmary. When we entered the room, we stumbled upon Violet clinging to her mother, crying a lot. I think that scene broke the heart of all of us. Phil approached her and said something in her ear; possibly told her we were there. She looked back and seeing we were really right there, got out of bed and run to us hugging us.


"Ji-Jimmy is... is dying..." - Zacky was in the middle and she rested her head on his chest and grabbed his sweater, hiding her face on it. She was crying so much that was very hard to understand her but what she had said wasn't true. It couldn’t be true. Zacky put his hand on her middle and pulled her away a bit to be able to look at her.


"He won't die." – Zacky said wrapped her in his arms.


"Each time I ask to a do-doctor or a nurse if he's okay... they answer me the prognosis is reserved and I have to wait till a doctor comes to talk to me. But I’m desperate! I need to see him... if something ad happens to him, it's my fault... it's my fault. I will never forgive mys-"


"Violet, stop... he'll be fine, are you hear me? He loves you a lot to let you here without him. And never, ever, say it's your fault again, okay? You’re guilty of so many things but not to this." – I said pulled her away of Zacky and approached her to me grabbing her arms. Violet cried more and more and I started to feel her body getting weak and falling to the ground. I took her in my arms and took her to the stretcher where her mom was crying too, with her finger on her lips and a scarf hiding between her hands. I lay Violet on the stretcher and she slowly turned to the wall, turning her back on us. I greeted her mother as Zacky, Johnny and Matt did.
That environment was letting us crazy. Matt and Zacky were looking for a doctor to ask for more information while Johnny and I stayed with Violet. Johnny was sitting beside Phil talking about the health problem of Jimmy. Apparently, this was the only thing that Jimmy hadn't told her. I sat near Violet, looking at her mother stroking her hair. I was so nervous that I felt like I would come into the intensive care room and hit a doctor until he tells me what's wrong with Jimmy. We've had to take him to the hospital many times but never like this. This time seemed to be serious and even I didn't know what to do. I got up and started to round and round until ten minutes later, I see Matt and Zacky running to us. Phil, Johnny and I got up and ran to them.


"We talked to a doctor. He comes here to talk to us." – Matt said.


"But did he say something about Jimmy's condition?" – I asked waiting for some good news.


"No... But it seems he's not any better..."


"It was serious this time, huh?" – Johnny said looking down with his eyes full of tears.


"Come on guys! Jimmy is strong! He can get this!" – I said. I looked back and walked towards Violet. I stroked her hair and I approached her to tell her that a doctor was coming to talk to us. She stood up suddenly, clinging to me and to her mother. She was very weak and continued refusing to eat. The doctor approached us with Phil, Johnny, Matt and Zacky. He was a doctor who seemed to have many years of experience and a great career. He has looked tired but seemed very competent. He grabbed Violet's hand and smiled at her sadly.


"It will not be easy to give you this news..." - Hearing this, Violet turned her face and began to cry on the shoulder of her mother. But the doctor quickly calmed her. - "Calm down, Miss Violet. He'll be fine. He just needs to continue the medication. Do you know if he was taking any heart medicine? Tranquilizers or..."


"Yes, he was taking three types of pills. I don't know exactly what it was but I think it was a calming." - I replied. We all knew that Jimmy was taking medication for his heart but we never knew what kind of drug it was. We avoided talking about it because he became too upset to talk about it.


"Exactly..." - Said the doctor, being interrupted by Violet.


"Tranquilizers? Jimmy never told me he was being medicated. He never told me he was ill!"


"This is what I come here to explain to you. Jimmy has a problem with his heart. His heart is very big for his ribcage. His heart has a tendency to increase in volume what does decrease the heart rate to drop and consequently gives a cardiopulmonary arrest. Tranquilizers that Jimmy takes, relieve pressure and anxiety that he may face. By the examinations that we did, he was not taking any medication at this time. He should have had a major crisis of nerves or I became very excited with something and his heart could not take that. Thank God, the paramedics have arrived in time. "


“Why did he never tell me that?”


“He didn't want you to worry about him. He also never told us. Who told us was his mother, Barbara.” – Johnny said. Violet wiped the tears from her face with the sleeve of wool sweater that was wearing and stood up of the stretcher.


“Can I see him? Please…”


“Yes, you can. I’m sorry but just can go two of us. He is under the influence of tranquilizers and a lot of people in the room will only worsen the situation.” - The boys looked at me, allowing me to go with Violet. She clung to my arm and we went up with the doctor to the room where Jimmy was. When we got there, Violet and I panicked seeing Jimmy linked to a series of machines. The sound of heart rate and oxygen masks made ​​that space more intimate and sad. We approached Jimmy slowly. Violet grabbed his hand and gave him a gentle kiss on his forehead, stroked his cheek, causing him to open up just a little bit his eyes. He was yellow, a weird color that seemed he was dead. He didn't almost move himself and I couldn't see my best friend in that condition anymore. He looked at Violet and then at me and smiled slightly closing his eyes again. I approached him across the bed and grabbed his other hand trying to give him my full support.


“I had a dream about a song to our new album.” - Jimmy said, whispering. He was so weak he had no strength to speak.


“What?” - Violet and I asked completely confused with what Jimmy had said.


“Yeah… I was blurred with afraid when I asked Violet to marry me. I thought she would say no. Then I dreamed of a new song. It will be called 'A Little Piece of Heaven'. But I need to write it now because after a while I'll forget it.” - Violet and I looked at each other in shock, and then we went back to look at Jimmy. This time, he was better with color and his eyes were more open. He looked at us with that teasing smile that only he has like if he was making fun of us. He almost died and now was talking about a song? – “Do you have a piece of paper and a pen, babygirl?”


“Are you fucking kidding with me right now?” - Violet said with a straight face, controlling the tears which have taken over her eyes. – “I almost lost you, Jimmy. I saw you almost dying in my arms and I didn’t know what to do. I don't know what would become of me if I lost you.”


“Violet… I already told you so many times… you’ll never lose me. If I had died, you can be sure I’d still with you forever.” – Jimmy said pulling Violet near him very slowly, grabbing her arm, and then he looked at me and smiled. – “I'll never let you suffer. You’ll never be alone. I am sure that if I died, someone very close to me will protect you as much as I do.”

By your side.

“What?”


“Marry me, Violet.”


Jimmy grabbed my hand with his free hand and my eyes were just staring at his eyes and at that beautiful ring which was in front of me. I felt happiness was beginning in my chest. it was like a balloon that was filled very quickly and was about to explode. for a moment I thought I was dreaming. Staring into his eyes, unconsciously I started taking steps back as if I was fleeing from him. Jimmy's eyes became darker and his smile that had once on his lips, had disappeared. He asked me again if I would marry him but I was paralyzed and I couldn't say a word. The happiness was taking over from me and I felt my eyes fill with tears that I would not be able to control that they started to go my face. Jimmy was thinking I didn't want to marry him. He looked at the ring, closed the box and put it back in his pocket.


"I thought it was the right time... I'm so sorry... We should go home." - Jimmy said, without looking at me, putting his hands in his coat pockets. I could take no more. I started to feel my stomach bubbling and threw myself into his arms, where I warmly wrapped myself, no longer controlling my tears and grinning like a sweet kid. Slowly, I felt Jimmy's arms around me and he pressed me against his body.


"I do."


“What had you said?”


“I’ll marry you, Jimmy. It's what I want most in my life. My dream is to be with you forever and promise I'll love you until the day we die.”


“Say that again.”


“I wanna marry you and I promise I’ll love you forever, Jimmy!”


“Oh my God, I love you so much, Violet. I love you. I love you. I love you! I really do, Vi. I’m the happiest man in the world!” - Jimmy grabbed me in his arms and started walking around filling me with kisses on my lips, cheeks and neck. He screamed how much she loved me and how much he was happy. I was in ecstasy. I just laughed and clung to him to keep him near me as much as possible. Only five words got out of my mouth: 'I love you so much'. He turned away from me, grabbing my hand. I wiped the tears from his face and he gave me a kiss on my forehead. I couldn't stop smiling. Jimmy looked at the sky and breathed deeply. - "Thank you, God. Thank you for giving me this angel. Without her, I wouldn't be anyone because it thanks to her that I am who I am and it’s thanks to her that I never stop believes in You, in me, in her, in us." - He grabbed my hand, pulled my glove and with the other hand took the ring box out of his pocket. He opened it, took out the ring from there and put it on my ring finger. - "I promise you that during the years that I'll be with you, I will love you more than someone else can love you, I will protect you more than myself and I will respect you as I respect my mother. You are everything to me, Violet. You are everything to me and I don't ever want to lose you."


“And I promise I will love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow everyday of our lives. It’s for you that I struggle daily because you're part of me. Without you, I would be incomplete. I cannot imagine my life without you again, Jimmy. You’re everything to me. You are my life, my soul, my reason for living. And that is why I'll marry you in any way whatsoever. Because the important thing for me is to make you happy and be happy by your side. I love you now and forever.”


“Aw babygirl… come here! I have no words to expl-”- I felt Jimmy giving me a huge squeeze and he stopped talking. I pulled away from him, grabbing his arms and he was making an expression as if he hadn't been feeling well. He closed his eyes and gritted her teeth, taking one of his hands to his heart.


"Jimmy, what's wrong? Jimmy?" - He didn't answer me. I felt his body getting heavy and he clung to me with huge strength, hurting me a bit. I could no longer keep him upright, and Jimmy fell on his knees making me fall with him. - Jimmy, please talk to me! Jimmy, please! "


"Vi... I ca-can't." - Jimmy was starting to stop breathing and he was turning very red with the effort he was making to breathe. I began to panic and the only thing I was doing was yell for him. I took the mobile phone from his pocket, but I was shaking so much it was hard to get it. I left the mobile phone hit the ground, I got it back, always calling Jimmy to make him don't lose the consciousness, and called 911. But the number was not available. I didn't know what to do and it seemed that my brain was blocking. Jimmy shouted increasingly sore and I was becoming crazy. Until I remembered that number was 999 in London and quickly I called to ask for an ambulance. Less than 10 minutes, the ambulance was there and went to the hospital. In the ambulance, the paramedics placed an oxygen mask on Jimmy's face to get control breathing and called a number of machines to control the heartbeat and blood pressure. Jimmy looked at me and held out his hand for me to hold it. he smiled at me but suddenly he started to roll his eyes and his heartbeat began to diminish little by little.


"We're losing him!" - Said one of the paramedics. I started to panic and I didn't know what to think or what to do. I couldn't believe what was happening. And thus I couldn't lose Jimmy this way. He couldn't leave me like this. He couldn't leave without me. Paramedics did resuscitation but it wasn't working until they started giving him electric shocks. I approached Jimmy to somehow try to save him but one of the paramedics pulled me away. However, we arrived at the hospital and went straight to intensive care room. Approached to us a team of doctors who surrounded Jimmy and someone pulled me away from him.


"Come with me." - Said a nurse hugging me and pushing me away from Jimmy.


"I cannot let him go. I don't want to lose him. Please, I cannot lose him." - I cried more and more and I fell to the ground completely helpless and hopeless. The nurse took me to a room where I took two pills and a glass of water. I took the pills and I just remember waking up 2 hours later with my mother and my brother beside me. – “Where’s Jimmy?”


“We don’t know, Vi. We have to wait.”


“No, I can’t wait. I have to know what’s happening with him. He almost died in my arms.” – I jumped from the stretcher and started running but my brother stopped me. – “Let me go, Phil. Let me go, please.”


“Violet, please, stop! You have to wait. You can’t do anything.”


“Yes, I can! I have to save him. if he die, I’ll go with him.”


“Violet, daughter, please keep calm. Jimmy will be okay.”


“He was almost dying, mom. I saw my boyfriend almost dying moments later he had asked me to marry him.” – My mom looked at my brother, showed me a sad smile and looked at her lap. I went to the hallway where, walking from one place to another, I was looking for a nurse or a doctor to ask how was Jimmy. I could not stop crying until Jimmy's phone, which was in my pocket, started ringing. I looked at the screen to check who was. It was Brian. I waited a few moments to give time to him to give up. I wasn't prepared to give such news. I couldn't even speak. But then I thought it would be unfair on my part. Brian was the best friend of Jimmy. So I decided to talk to him after three deep breaths.


“Brian.”


“Violet? Where’s Jimmy?” - I tried to control my tears but each time I tried to do that, I felt like I had a rope around my neck that was pressing more and more. Brian realized that I wasn't well and his tone was calmer to try to understand what was happening. – “Vi… you know you can trust me besides everything but… what happened?”


“I’m in a hos-pital…”


“Hospital?”


“Jimmy’s not okay, Brian…”


“It’s about… it’s about his heart?”


“I don’t know, Brian. He alm-ost died in my ar-ms and I didn’t kn-ow what to do.”


“He’s okay now, isn’t he?”


“I don’t know. I’m waiting some good information. You have no idea how hearing the paramedics saying ‘we’re losing him’ killed me inside.”


“Oh my God…” – Brian stopped talking for a while and I just could hear his breaths. – “I go to the airport now. I have to be there.”


“Wait until I know something, Brian. Then I tell you something -"


"Wait? I almost lost my brother and you're asking me to wait?"


"Brian, I saw Jimmy dying in front of me! I just want to make things easier, okay? But do what you want."


"I'm so sorry, Vi. I'm sorry. I didn't..."


"I know you didn't want to say that but I'm dying as you are, okay? I could be far away from Jimmy all these years but it doesn't mean I forgot him, okay? He’s my life, Brian. If he'll die and swear for God I will go with him."


“Please Violet, stop saying that! Please… Jimmy won’t die, okay? He has so many things to do in this life. He has to marry you. You’re the most important thing to him…”


“I know…”


“So, stop crying. He will be fine! And he needs you there with a huge smile.”


“Thank you, Brian.”


“Don’t be silly. He’s strong, Violet. He’s been through worse things, believe me.”

NOTES:

It was very hard to me to write this chapter. it's very difficult to have to imagine the pain that Jimmy had to pass along his life. but this is how I try to honor him, trying to show how strong he was and the way he managed to repeatedly exceed the pain that killed him slowly and gradually.

Under the Stars

"There you go and good luck!”


“Thank you very much, sir.”


We left the store and while I was walking towards the car, I opened the ring box to look at it one more time. Each time I looked at it, I felt chills in my entire body. It was time to us to get together forever. Now, nothing could separate us. I chose Violet to be my wife even I don’t believe in marriage but I felt this was necessary to get us even closer.


“So, Jimmy, where will you propose her?” - Michelle asked when we were getting into the car.


“I didn’t think about it. Maybe tonight.”


“Tonight?” - Brian asked, putting his seat belt and looking at me with panic look.


“Yeah! I really need to do this. I can’t wait anymore.”


“Jimmy, you’ll just propose Vi. Take it easy.”


“Just? Are you fucking kidding me, Chelle? This will be one of the best days ever when I hear Violet saying ‘yes’.


“But you two go to London this dawn. Your flight is at 4 am. Do you think it’s a good idea to ask her to marry her tonight?”


“Chelle is right, dude. You go to London. It was there that everything happens. It would be so fucking romantic to propose her there…”


“Yeah, in the garden!”


“Which garden?” - Brian and Michelle asked with a very curious tone.


"There’s a very big garden near our neighborhood. We lived so many good moments there. It was there that we kissed each other for the first time.”


“See? Just wait one more day. I’m sure she’ll be so fucking happy.”


“I hope you’re right Gates, but… and if she says no?”


“Fuck you, Jimmy! She loves you. I think she loves you more than she loves herself.”


“Thanks for the support guys!”


After leaving Michelle and Brian in his house, I went back home. As Violet still was with Bea, I took the time to prepare the moment I would ask Violet to marry me. I ran into a room where I had stored old things. I opened several cartons containing several things I had done or bought in the past and others that people had offered me.
I wanted to find something where I could hide the ring box. I knew there was something there that was perfect for the occasion but I could not remember what it was. Until I found something with various things related to Avenged Sevenfold. I found several skeletons of many shapes, handkerchiefs, sweaters, and also a set of glasses with a Deathbat. But in the back of the box there was what I was looking for. A small coffin. It was perfect for the moment. I mean, I was preparing my proposal not our death, but I was sure Violet would understand my idea. 'Till death do us part'. These words were engraved on top of the coffin. I bought it for three or four years just thinking about Violet.

I opened the coffin and placed there the ring box with the ring inside. I closed the box, I got up from the chair where I was sat, turned back and went back to look at the coffin. I sat down again, turned the coffin to me and opened it. I didn't like what I saw. It was an ugly thing in front of me. The ring box was beautiful and elegant and the coffin was wooden with a dark aspect. That idea was out of the question. But I wanted, in fact, to use that coffin.
I stood up again and looked around me. In the midst of the things I had taking out of the some boxes, there was a block of old sheets of paper, recycled paper type. It was in those sheets that I wrote most of the letters to Violet. I picked up the block and a pen and started writing another letter. This time I was sure it would be delivered. The words appeared without much difficulty. It seemed my heart was dictating that words to my brain and leave them getting out by the ink pen that I was using to write one more declaration of love. Ten minutes later, I finished the letter. I folded it into three parts and put it in the coffin. Now all I needed was to buy her a big bunch of flowers but I would have to do it when we were in London. Suddenly, I heard some noise coming to the living room. Violet had already arrived. I hid the little coffin in the middle of all that stuff and ran into the living room. I opened the door and Violet was taking her coat. I ran to her and kissed her so much till she had to ask me to stop.


“Jimmy, I miss you too but I’ll die in your arms if you don’t let me breathe.”


“I’m sorry babygirl but I don’t see you since this morning. It’s too much time for me.”


“I know, Jim. It’s too much time for me too. I passed all this time talking about you with Bea so… you were always in my mind!”


“Aw, babygirl. I love you so fucking much.”


“I love you more, Jimmy.” – Now, it was Violet who started kissing me without stop. Her hands were in my chest and her soft touch was turning me on. I pushed her against my body, without stopping kissing her. My lips running for her neck and I felt her breathe becoming heavy. I started slowly pushing her towards the couch. When we got there, Violet's hands began to explore every detail of my body by placing them inside my sweater. I felt her nails sliding on my cold skin and I felt my whole body was shivering. I stopped kissing her to look in her eyes. She looked at me with her brown eyes shining, full of desire. She approached her lips from mine and began kissing me very gently letting our lips come together like raindrops sliding the petals of a flower. My hands slid from her back to her buttocks, making her to jump to me, wrapping her legs around my waist. I sat on the couch, getting her on my lap kissing me more and more. It was being difficult to control myself much longer.


"You drive me crazy."


"And you make me lose my mind every time you look at me with those blue eyes and this bully smile."


"I want to make love to you right now, Violet."


"Don't say anything else and let our bodies do the rest."

*** In the break of dawn ***

“Good morning, Miss Sullivan!”


“Hey, Brian. Come in.”


“Thanks. Where’s Jimmy?”


“I have no idea. He finished the breakfast and disappeared.”


“What?”


“He said he had to get something. Can you help me with these bags, please?”


“Sure. For that reason I woke up so early.”


“It wasn’t necessary this sarcastic tone, Gates!”


“It’s my tone.”


“‘It’s my tone.’ Shut up and help me, come on.”


“At your service, ma'am.”


“Please, Brian. Stop!”


“Jesus, Violet. You want me to help you or to stop?”


“Look, Brian. Fuck you!”


“Fuck you too. I don't know how Jimmy puts up with you.”


“Jimmy loves to put up with me, okay?”


“Yeah, sure!” – I had gone to the stuff’s room to fetch the small coffin and the ring which I let there in the previous day. I read the letter one more time and check if the ring was inside the ring box. Everything was okay unless in the living room. I started to hear Brian and Violet arguing with each other on the living room. Brian had offered himself to take us to the airport and Violet was waiting for him. Well, apparently, he was already there and they liked very much to be together. I took a deep breath and tried to control myself to no laugh.


“What’s wrong with you guys?”


“Brian’s fault.”


“Brian’s fault? It’s you who don’t know what you want.”


“What???”


“Please, guys. I am the craziest guy here but you two together seem to be children. Come on, babygirl. I put the bags in the car with Brian.”


“Thanks, honey. I was already becoming sick.” – Violet went to our bedroom to bring Mr. Bungle. Yeah, I didn’t already ask Brian to take care of Mr. Bungle. He didn’t like very much of Iguanas but now he really had to take care of him. Brian looked back to Violet and then looked at me with a puzzle look while we was bringing Violet’s bag to the car.


“Is she really sick?”


“Hell no. She went to fetch Mr. Bungle.”


“Wow, will you take him with you?”


“No. you’ll take it with you to take care of him.”


“WHAT? No, no, no. Jimmy, I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”


“Come on, pussy. Michelle takes care of him. You just need to drive to her house and let him there.”


“I can’t drive with him by my side, Jimmy. ARE YOU INSANE?”


“No, you are.” – I looked to the door and Violet was ready to go. She approached us with Mr. Bungle in a transport box for cats. She knew Brian hate iguanas and animals like that, so she looked at him with a very naughty smile and gave him the box. Brian hesitated a bit to accept it but he didn’t want to show her that he was afraid. Quickly, he took Mr. Bungle inside of the car and got inside of it too. Half an hour later, we were at the airport.


“Well, have a nice flight.”


“Thank you, Brian.”


“Violet… I’m sorry for… that stupid scene.”


“Don’t worry. All teenagers go through this.”


“Are you saying me I’m a kid?”


“No. she’s saying you both are kids.”


“That’s right. We have to grow up in our friendship, Brian.”


“We deal with it when you come back.” – Violet hugged Brian and then Brian hugged me to say goodbye. He approached to my ear and I could figure what he would say to me. – “Good luck, buddy. Call me when she said yes.”


“I will, Gates. Thanks for everything.”

*** 12 hours later ***

It was 6 am, December 22nd 2006 in London. Violet’s family didn’t know we were there so soon. We got up the taxi and took the bags out of the car trunk. it was very cold and there was a lot of snowy. But even so, Violet and I stayed a few moments looking at the whole scenario ahead. Our houses together just like we were. I held Violet's hand and she looked at me with an innocent smile on her face. Those few minutes have passed through my mind so many images like a movie. I spent so many good times here with her. It was here where our story began. It was thus, taking the bags out from the car, I saw Violet for the first time. It was with that innocent smile she looked at me for the first time. I put my arm around Violet's shoulders and gave her a kiss on her forehead.


"It’s so good to be back with you."


"Increasingly more I love you, Jimmy. And be here with you just gives me even more certain that you're all that I want."


"Do your words mines, sweetheart." – She kissed me and we approached towards the front door. Violet opened it very slowly to avoid making some noise. We hid the bags in the office of Violet’s mum. While little Barbara and Mary didn’t wake up, Violet and I went to her bedroom rest a bit.
Some hours later, we woke up with Barbara singing in the bathroom. She sang with a so innocent voice but yet so aggressive that made ​​me smile. I looked up Violet when I felt her hands stroking my head. Violet had expressed the sweetest smile on her face and her eyes filled with tears. I brought my hand up to her face and gave her a kiss on her lips.


“Came the day your little sister will know the author of those letters.”


“She’ll love you.”


“Barbara! Come to take the breakfast!” – Violet mum’s yelled.


“I’m coming!”


Violet and I waited a moment till Barbara came into the chicken. Vi was so nervous that made me became nervous too. She didn’t see her family since September and I knew how much excited she was to be with them again. She held my hand and opened the door but before we left the bedroom, I pushed her back to me and gave her a kiss.


“Now, I’m ready!”


“I knew you need it.” – Violet gave me one more kiss and now we were ready to do a surprise. We left the room and went down the stairs, very slowly. Approaching to the kitchen we heard Mary and Barbara talking about the breakfast. It seemed Barbara was making a tantrum because she didn’t want to eat fruit and Mary was urging her. – “It is time for you to go there. I’ll wait for you in the living room.”


“Okay, Jim. I wanna prepare my little sister you’re here.”


“I think I would be more excited than she will. She is my newest fan. And my sister-in-law too.”


“I love you. I'll try not to take too long.” – She stroked my face and walked to the kitchen.

*** Violet’s POV ***

“Baba, you should do what mama is saying.” – I said crossing my arms. My mum and my little sister looked back to me. my mom dropped the mug and came running towards me, crying like a baby and hugging me with such force that almost broke the bones. She started kissing my cheeks and I was trying to stop laughing to breathe. Until she dumped me, grabbed my arms and looked at me to see how I was.


"You're a woman. My child... you are so beautiful!" - I was trying to control my tears but when I felt my little sister grabbed my legs and crying silent tears, I cannot control myself anymore. I put myself on my knees and hugged my sister while she clung to my neck giving me kisses on my cheek.


"I thought you would never come back, sis."


"I would never do such a thing, Baba. I will never leave you.”


“Promise?”


“I promise, sweetheart. Now, come with me. I have a surprise to you.” – I looked to my mum and she nodded with her head and smile. She knew Jimmy was there with me. I looked at my sister and wiped the tears from her face as she smiled at me and stroked my face with her tiny hands.


“You brought a gift for me?”


“Yeah! I have lots of gifts to you, to mummy and to Phil. But there’s someone in the living room who wants to know you.”


“Someone? Who?”


“Do you remember about my letters?”


“Jimmy? Jimmy’s here?” – My sister asked. I became so, so happy to see her so much excited to know Jimmy was there. Baba always wanted to know Jimmy. Besides she was very young, she knew how much Jimmy was important to me and how much he made me happy. She grabbed my hand and began to pull me out the kitchen. But I stooped her. Jimmy was a different and Barbara was not used to living with people like Jimmy. He had much of the tattooed body and she could get a bit confused with this. So I turned her to look at me.


"Baba, Jimmy is not like the boys in your school. He's like Phil's friends."


"How? Is he taller?"


"Yes, he is very taller but he has a Rock band. That music type I listen to."


"That music full of screams?"


"Yes, that kind of music. And... He has many tattoos."


"I like tattoos. Then I'll draw a tattoo for him to get in his arm."


"It’ll be difficult to get another tattoo on his arm but you'll talk to him about it, deal?"


"Deal! But sis I want to see him. Come on!" – Baba grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the living room. My mother followed us, and Jimmy, seeing us approaching him, rose from the couch and looked at me smiling. I could see in his eyes that he was very nervous. He looked like he was going to meet my father for the first time. I understood why he was nervous. Never underestimate the power of a child. I wasn't worried because I knew Barbara would love to know Jimmy. His eyes quickly left mine to find my sister. I felt her tiny hand dropping mine and she looked intently at him.
Jimmy looked at her with the same smile that showed me when we first met. Barbara continued to look at him without reaction until she began to walk slowly toward him.


“Hi!” - lowering up to get eye contact. She didn't say a word but suddenly threw herself upon his neck, hugging him tightly.


"Thank you, Jimmy. Thanks to your letters my sister is alive." - hearing those words from my sister, I felt my body getting as heavy as a rock. I felt a huge choke. I never thought that moment when my sister used the letters from Jimmy to keep me from killing myself had marked so much. I never thought she still remembered that bleak moment of my life. My eyes filled with tears. My mother approached me; putting her arm around my shoulders and leaning her head on mine. Jimmy looked at me with a panic look and without knowing what to do. My sister dropped him and smiled at him.


"I always wanted to meet you. My sister loves you so much. She told me so many stories of you two. Every night I pray for you to marry her and have many babies."


"Thank you, Barbara. I'm very happy to hear that. You cannot imagine how happy I am."


"When I'll be a woman, I also wanna have a boyfriend named Jimmy who writes me letters like that ones you wrote to my sister."


"I'm sure you will find one Jimmy who will love you too." – Then, my little sister didn’t leave Jimmy anymore. My mum greeted Jimmy and said how much he was different. I was so happy and looking at Jimmy, I think he was more than me. We took the breakfast all together and then I called to my brother to come to lunch with us. while my mum and I were in the kitchen preparing the lunch, Jimmy and Barbara were playing on the living room.

*** Jimmy’s POV ***

I was very confused to hear Violet's sister saying thanks to my letters, Violet was alive. I had to clarify this with Violet but moments later the subject disappeared from my mind. Barbara was very excited to meet me which made me very happy and surprised because always, when the kids know me, are terrified of me. I used to frighten and terrify all kids of Huntington Beach. But I was different and Barbara was different.


“Will you and my sister getting married?”


“If I tell you a secret, you promise don’t tell anything to anyone?”


“I promise.”


“Okay… I’ll ask her tonight.”


“Aw, really? Give her red roses. She loves them.”


“I know. So I need your help. Do you know if the florist shop on the corner is still open?”


“Yeah!”


“I need to go there but your sister can’t know.”


“Call my brother. He must be coming. So, before coming here, he goes there and buys the roses.”


“Excellent idea! You’re very smart, huh. You’re like your sister.”


“Yes, I am.” – I call Phil and he did me the favor to go there and buy the roses. Minutes later, Phil came and before greeted him, I took the floors and ran towards Vi’s bedroom. I put them over the bed with the little coffin. My idea was Violet find them and went to the garden at night where I was waiting for her to propose her. But then, I thought how much would be difficult to avoid Violet to go to her bedroom. So, I took the coffin with me. I would read her the letter on the garden and then ask her to marry me. And that's how it happened. After dinner, I managed to convince Violet to stroll down to the garden. I confess I never even thought about the cold it was out there because all I wanted was to ask her to marry me in that garden that was so important to us.


"My God, it's so different when it's covered in snow."


"It's true. Yet it's still being romantic."


"Jimmy, with you, each place is romantic."


"You know why?"


"Tell me."


"Because I love you so much."


“You’re my life.” – looking at Violet’s eyes, I knew it was the perfect moment to do what I had to do. I took the coffin out of my pocket and gave it to Violet. She was amazed looking at it and read the words that were on the top of it. She looked at me seriously, expecting something from me. For a few moments, I think she thought I was going to kill her because I felt some trepidation on her part. I approached her and gave her a kiss on the forehead while I opened the small coffin where I got the letter. A big smile appeared on her face. Then I started reading it aloud.


‘December 22nd 2006,

Dear Violet Butterfly,

Eight years later, here we are again where our story began. It was here, in this garden, that we lived so good moments. It was here I kissed your sweet and tasty lips for the first time. It was here that I walked hand in hand with you for the first time. It was here where we passed night after night under the stars, saying just shit that was, at that time, important things to us. It was here, in this city, that I fell in love with you and I met the woman of my life.

The woman for whom I fought all these years. The woman who made ​​me change and who made​​me believe in me. The woman for whom I would die without think twice. You’re the cause of my smile, the constant brightness in my eyes. You’re the reason I'm still with open eyes in this world, because if wasn't you, I would have given up. I suffered a lot by not having you by my side over these years, but still I suffered more because I didn't know anything about you. I felt empty and I felt that nothing made ​​sense. I traveled paths that weren't the right ones. But I knew that, as far as you were, you were also thinking about me.

How would you know, I've never been a religious person but I am sure that God exists. He exists because God put you in my path. God exists because He brought you to me again after all these years. He did this because He knew how much we loved each other. You are everything to me and without you I would not be the same Jimmy Sullivan. I am very proud of you. I'm very proud of us. Because of you, I want to live for many more years. I want to live many more years at your side, our children terrorizing us and later we were counting our beautiful love story to our grandchildren. I never believed in it but you do all this seems real. And that is why we are here today. That is why tonight I brought you to this garden.’


Then, staring at her eyes, and being illuminated by dim light of lamps and by the moonlight, I took the ring box out of my pocket and stretching my arm towards Violet, opened it.


“Violet, will you marry me?”